Happy Birthday iPhone, You Skinny Bitch

Wow, I can’t believe that it’s been four whole years since we started dating. It only seems like yesterday when your camera only had 2 megapixels and you still had your cute baby fat which I was really attracted to. You were such a simpler girlfriend back then, so much nicer, you used to be […]

Happy Memorial Day Sale – Extra 15% Off + Free Shipping !!

In honor of all those who have shopped all over this great land of freedom called America (The Mall Of), and for those who have died on the battlefields of miserably long retail lines, we salute you with an extra 10% off your entire purchase if you sign up for one of our credit cards […]

Happy Secretary's Day : Who Says Sexism Is Dead?

“Thank you for calling ACME typewriter company, this is Betty, how can I direct your call?” … How about you be a good girl and fetch me a nice hot cup of jo sweetie, and this time do it the way I like it … two sugars!! Thanks doll. Oh, and if Mr. Smith calls tell him […]

Merry Fifth of Shots

Hey everybody! Looking forward to celebrating the proud Mexican people’s day of Independence!? Well that shit ain’t ’till the middle of September so you’re gonna be dry a long time if that’s what you’re REALLY looking to celebrate. But let’s be honest, that’s not why you’re excited about Cinco de Mayo. We know it’s not […]

Van Full of Easter Candy

Easter is traditionally celebrated for two things: a) the brutal shit kicking of Jesus Horatio Christ, culminating in his being affixed to a tree and propped up in Rome’s front yard like a pink flamingo that’s been kicked in the face for an hour. You know, for you and your stupid sins. And 2) delicious seasonal candies. […]

VFoC’s Official Drinking Game Rules

We at Van Full of Candy enjoy drinking. And no, we do not have a problem. That’s for amateurs. We are professional grade imbibers. But we generally save our heavy drinking for special occasions, namely, holidays which celebrate Saints. St. Valentine, St. Patrick, St. Nicholas, St. President’s Day, St. Wednesday. And while drinking until you involuntarily head […]

The 2011 Pre-St. Paddy’s Day Pub Crawl-Pub Crawl

Wednesday March 16th 10:30am – Apartment Hey, what’s up everyone, just wanted to get the live blog update started with the 2011 Pre St. Patty’s Day Pubcrawl here on campus where they get things started early. So early in fact, that I’m actually already a couple of hours behind everyone else since I woke up […]

VFoC’s Presidents Day Fun Facts

The public school system is failing. Ask any public school kid now a days to give you the names of every US President and they’d probably have a hard time coming up with even half of the 59 men who have served in this country’s highest office. That is why we at Van Full of […]