VFoC Video — “Trans-Am”

Idiot #1: How do you like my new hair cut Moron #2? Moron #2: That is quite a finely cut set of hairs Idiot #1. I would go so far as to call that haircut “awesome”. Us: Hey idiot. Lookie here moron. You’re wrong; shut the fuck up. Has this kind of thing happened to […]

VFoC "LIVE" on The Comedy Buffet’s Podcast

The good fellas at The Comedy Buffet were kind enough to let us stink up their otherwise hilarious podcast the other night. We’d like to apologize in advance for our uncontrolable crass behavior, rude language, and complete disregard to fat kids, cross-dressing boys, and religion in general, … yeah right, who am I kidding? Let’s face it, […]

Sarah Palin: Professional Grifter

It used to be that a huckster would rumble into town in a brightly colored wagon emblazoned with grandiose hyperbole about their stature and abilities. And the townsfolk, how they would flock to this charismatic charlatan, selling them something they thought they wanted, taking their “donations” for the promise of a better life and happier tomorrow. […]

Secret Baby Genitalia Are Destroying Our Country

Your child needs to be told by everyone exactly what their genitalia mean to them socially and psychologically but then must never, under any circumstances, ever actually be instructed on how to use them by anyone. Especially not with weird anatomically correctish stuffed toys… But we’ll get to that… You see, two equally and oppositely frustrating stories popped up in various […]

Happy Secretary's Day : Who Says Sexism Is Dead?

“Thank you for calling ACME typewriter company, this is Betty, how can I direct your call?” … How about you be a good girl and fetch me a nice hot cup of jo sweetie, and this time do it the way I like it … two sugars!! Thanks doll. Oh, and if Mr. Smith calls tell him […]

Two-Arm Two-Fer Tuesday

I’m noticing a very strange and scary trend happening in the world right now, and it’s making me very uncomfortable, as it should you too. As I was watching a rerun of House, the medical show with the guy who has a cane and walks around with a limp, acting all “smarter than thou” and […]

A Rebuttal: Double Good Money Time

Hi, I’m the Internet’s Jesse Jones. You may know me from such things as the what you’re reading now and that time I punched science. Earlier this week, my Van companion, or “Vanpanion” Jason expressed his violent, some would say, misguided hatred for the two dollar bill. Normally when Jason says something wildly hysterical and irresponsible, I […]