Brad Pitt : The Movie … Right?

In our many drives up and down this country’s most awesome state of Californyeaye (no offense NY in lieu of the 10 year) we see many great things , and being that half of the van is based GawdDammHollywood bitches we see a lot of movie-stars and boring shit like that. Yeah boring, I said it … it’s like seeing a crack addict when  you live in Oakland, it’s not unusual, you just get used to it, and in a number of cases it’s your own family if not yourself, but if you’re visiting from Montana and you see a crack addict, you bust out your camera phone and show all of your family when you get back because you don’t know how to upload to YouTube or Facebook yet, not will you ever, if you even have a phone with a camera, or a cell phone, or … well … even a camera, but I digress Montanians.

As the van made its way through the LA, it stumbled upon a billboard that could only be described as a documentary or biopic or something along the lines of a movie about somebody that has to do with something biographically filmy. The billboard is titled “Brad Pitt” in bold beautiful white letters, and then underneath his hot handsome name is a picture of Hotty McHotterson with a beautiful green baseball field background, his luxurious light brown hair kissed by the sun giving highlights that women would kill for, or spend $180 dollars for at a beeeeuty salon, looking back with his look of confidence and a slight smirk of “yeah, I belong here” that makes us all slow our cars down and puppy dog eye a little at his marvel and hit the brakes just in time to avoid that completely annoying fender bender that would get us to our destination 30 minutes later than normal and hope that douchebag has insurance … and then there’s some other words underneath it which really don’t matter much, blah blah blah, Moneyball, blah, other names, blah blah.

I’d watch that movie all day … whatever the fuck it is !!

What’s the point of wasting all that billboard space with more words that don’t mean anything more than they had to make a smaller picture of Brad-Brad? Why even put his name? We know who he is !! We don’t need to know anything more than his beautiful face, as big as possible on billboards and posters around the city, and we just know when to show up to drop our $12 to see his Academy Award winning performances over and over and … 12 Monkeys counts right? Anyway, what I’m getting at is I cannot WAIT to see the movie named “Brad Pitt” because it just HAS to be great !! And what the F is a moneyball? Besides the one that hangs a little lower than the other in his sack?

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