Japanese Karaoke Machines Give Real Rock ‘n Roll Rewards: Naked Ladies

Ask any rock star — hell, ask any rocket scientist; whether it’s shredding some hot licks or calculating some sick ass sums, they’re all doing it for the groupies. Yes, science groupies. Don’t think it’s a thing? I do. I haven’t specifically searched to prove it’s a thing, but if you find that there’s no […]

Star Wars Fan Turns Living Room Into Hoth Diorama

You’re not gonna find a bigger fan of re-creating large semi-historical battle fields on a 1/7th scale than me, but there may a point where excess is reached. I’m not saying it is here, clearly this is a perfectly reasonable re-creation of motion picture history which is above mockery. I’m just saying, there might be a […]

Strong Bad takes Daft Punk to The Limit

Homestar Runner has made a glorious –albeit infrequently released– return to the internets of late. But before that was a thing, Daft Punk released an album. Then someone decided to do the best, most logical thing that could have been done, and the result was this. I still listen to it in its entirety on […]

American Public School’s New Science Text Book: Cake

They say that the quickest way to a man’s heart is through his stomach. And while anatomy class may disagree, we’re not talking about actual learning here, we’re talking about school! And the plain fact is that the fastest way to an American student’s brain is straight through the pudgy little tum-tum. Originally posted on Your […]

Adorable Disney Favorites + Zombie Apocalypse = The Walking Disney

If you like one thing, but wonder what it would look like if that one thing you like lived in the world of another thing you like, well you’re in luck because you have “the Internet”. The Internet is a magical place where you every dream exists, just waiting for you to find it, and your […]

Musical Cigarettes, Farting Texts: The Future of Cell Phone Technology

Technology: it just does things. It doesn’t stop to ask if anyone might want or need the things it’s doing. That’s for marketeers to figure out. Technology just sees that it can accidentally do something when it was meaning to do something else. Then does it. For better or for usually the other thing. Originally […]

Taco Bell Mistakenly Doesn’t Send Me Breakfast-Promo-Phone, I Cry

I think if I’ve made one thing clear over the sporadic years of screaming things over the internet eye waves, it’s that I want to be sent things by companies so that I can feel pretty! But it seems for all of my well worded pleadery, I’m still not worthy of being allowed to tell […]

Aussie Teacher Gets Last, Least-Classy Word On Dead School Bully

An eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth. That’s all well and good and actionable in a fair fight, but what if the eye you’re trying to get for your eye is decomposing in a box. Is it REALLY the high road if you don’t still take that easily takeable eye? Who’s REALLY […]

In Mongolia They Can’t Say “Shit” Now, Like I Just Did

FUCK! Ahhh, there, that felt good. I hadn’t really been able to use my full, luscious vocabulary on the internet in a while. But I’m still better off than folks in some countries, where the first word in this post would probably have gotten their finger-tips hacked off in some sort of public ceremony meant […]