We here at Van Full of Candy are just completely NOT OKAY with the way that we’re portrayed out in the, what you people call, the regular world. Constantly being called, the creepy van, the molester van, the rapist kidnapper old man with puppies and candy with a mustache van who wants to kill you with duct tape van … yeah that’s right, a double van. We are just completely fed up with this horrific name calling and all of you should be ASHAMED !!! Here’s a few examples of the hurt that you people aim at us with your hurt … guns.
So when I heard today about what, who are probably the most boring students in college history, Ohio University students were doing, I totally had to get behind their poster campaign – “We’re a Culture, Not a Costume”. I’m sure they’re all running around campus with their “proud faces” on and how they’re making a radical change against racism and cultureism and not-ever-having-fun-again-on-Halloween-ism. Strutting their stuff thinking their VOICE is being heard and it will ripple throughout the world and possibly end global warming with love and “no more war” with their “about to cry” faces.
Go ahead you crazy little nerds, you did your duty, and you’ve probably completely ostracized yourselves from any invites to ANYTHING on campus EVER AGAIN. But hey, you got one follower, and that’s me, the misunderstood Van Full of Happy Fun Time, a Van Full of Giggles and Fingerpuppets, and gawd fucking damnit, we’re gonna make ourselves heard too. So here’s our sign you Ohionians, please add it to your well intentioned movement that will probably turn into meme’s making fun of you. And oh yeah, please consider ours, thanks. Now where’d I put my black shoe polish?